Man's Life sold for $5800 and change

A man's life Sold! on eBay. This completed auction included:

A New Life in the coastal town of Wollongong, Australia of a 24-year-old male.
Ownership of seller's
- Name
- Phone number
- All seller's possessions which included the following:

- Clothes,
- Roughly 300 CDs
- Surfboard
- Laptop (minus certain information with my discretion),
- Pushbike (Has wonky handlebars, may need some work)
- Books,
- Bed
- CD player
- Backpack
- Tennis racquets
- Golf Clubs(which you will have no idea how to use)
- Childhood photos
- Skateboard
- Nice lamp which his ex-girlfriend bought him.

- Seller to teach his skills which include the following

- Surfing (Expert)
- Climbing (Intermediate)
- Skateboarding (Novice)
- Handstand Skills (Expert)
- Fire Twirling Skills (Intermediate)
- Devil Stick Twirling (Expert)
(Plus many more)

###
The winner also received extras including

- A 4-week training course by the former me which includes the following:
- Many anecdotes and stories from a very interesting and intriguing past 24 years of my life
- 6 Jokes
- Haircut like seller's
- Piercings to the value of $180.

Plus 2 months of on-call support. Winning bidder also inherits 2 nemeses. I would want to know if the jokes were any good, first.

LINK